For that moment, that one second, I swore myheart stopped beating.

But then again, there's nothing in there.

I once read a novel, and in it there was this part that explains how it takes 7 years for every single cell in the human body to die. Which means 7 years from today, your body is filled with new cells which will last you another 7 years before they die &be replaced. The Marilyn Monroe film "The Seven Year Itch" was something along this line.

Does that mean I need 7 years to completely eradicate all thoughts &memories of us? Thats too fcking long man.

Tomorrow, school reopens. Kinda feeling blank towards it.

If this makes you happy, NO! Romeo, I'm not over you. I'm still feeling fcking upset. I'm still missing you. I still ask myself what did I do? Yes, does that make you feel a sense of triumph? I'm sorry I'm still so 'like that' because unlike guys, I actually commit. Some fineprints you have on your relationship contract. Woohoo she's sucha fcking loser man. Whatever. I got what I wanted man, I scored. & now I don't need to be there for her anymore since I'm outta school anyways I don't need a fcking girl man. Bros before Hoes.

Pfftt. Guys. Such Dickheads. So guys should stop blaming lesbians when all the girls are attached to them CAUSE YOU GUYS DONT KNOW HOW TO FCKING TREAT A GIRL. You guys don't even know exactly what you guys want & you jump into a relationship, thinking that one day when the relationship doesn't work out all I gotta do is just get out of it & nothing else matters cause she's none of your fcking problem BUT FCK YOU. DO YOU HAVE ANY FCKING IDEA HOW LONG IT TAKES FOR US TO FCKING GET OVER YOU? Seems like fcking forever I'm telling you. & sometimes when guys break up with girls they give a fcking pathetic reason like, "oh if we're meant to be, we'll be together in the future no matter what." SHIT YOU UPSIDE DOWN MAN. So you think you can just waltz in & out of our lives like its a fcking restaurant aye? FCK. So the next time you want a girl & she's attached to a lesbian, DON'T YOU DARE FCKING SAY YOU FCKING HATE LESBIANS.

Ok now that that's out of my system, at least I feel a slight tinge of .. hmm relief? Like finally something is off my chest. Phew. Sorry girls, I just broke the code of conduct, 'thou shalt seem nonchalant about breakup'. I can't. ARGH.

But then before a problem can cease to exist, I can totally feel another rising already. Fck luh.

PS: I know I'm going to regret posting this entry. But owells.